Saturday, July 17, 2010

My mothering thoughts

I intend for this post to be more about mothering topics rather than languaging topics, just as a heads up. But I will see where my thoughts are drifting to with my writing. First, some history.

For such a long time in my memory all I see is my aspirations to become a mother. I spent so much time watching my three younger siblings that I practically felt like I was their mother and that I had amazing mother experience. Turns out that older sibling experience and mother experience are their own two types of experiences.

I thought that in college I should just do what was fun for me, or what would get me a decent job, or whatever interested me that I could look into more if my aspiration to be a mother took longer than I thought. So I took a variety of, dance, languages, karate, TESOL and linguistics classes (to name a few)...but I kept my main focus on anything related to marriage and family. Because I thought that I would find the "right man" one day and marry him and have his babies and care for them while he worked to support us.

Now I am living that previous wish fulfilled and find that I have other aspirations besides always mothering and "wifering". My passions are begging me to unleash their power because I realize that by and large no one else is doing these things and the effect of my dreams fulfilled is going to be enormous.

And I also have to say that my passions coming back have nothing to do with the quality of my relationship with my husband and son or their ability to "fulfill me" as some might think of it. They are both wonderful human beings. My son is as cute as humanly possible and is always so sweet. Sometimes he'll keep looking at me until he can get me to smile. He must sense it when I am feeling sadness. It amazes me how observant he is, even just being so small and young. He was born on the day of "Larger than life" though...according to Anyway and my husband is always striving to be the absolute best he can be. He provides a physical comfort when I require it, he always knows what the "right thing" to say is in any given situation. Also he is voting my victory to channel the true creative force inside of me and fulfill my highest choices and life callings.

Being a wife and mother is a wonderful thing to be. And I think for me, to feel fulfillment as a creative force of healing to others that my roles as wife and mother are only going to be enhanced. So I look forward to this journey of using my positive energy and love of movement to bless others, including my husband and son.

No comments: